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Sunday, January 27, 2013

Twenty Six

26 years
26 stories
Life is is better than i dreamed of 26 hours ago
 
26 blessings
26 opportunities
Life is not what i thought it was 26 days ago
 
26 cousins
26 hugs
Phone conversations mean more than they did 26 months ago
 
26 finds me
26 loves me
God blessed me with a whole new world 26 years ago
 
I am not where i want to be
But i am not where i used to be
And i am grateful to God
For His continuous presence
 
 Inspired by Twenty four - Switchfoot
****
 
 
Me: Guess how old i'm going to be on Sunday?
Kid A: 14?
Me: No, silly. 26! :D
Kid B: *pointing and laughing* You're ooolllldddd...
Kid A: You know, when you're close to a hundred it means you're going to die soon!
 
***
You can find my Amazon wishlist here , you're welcome. And no, it's never too late to get me a present ;)
 
My girls!
 


Chocolate molten cake from Chili's to me :D
 

No comment.
 I appreciate the love and support i've gotten from everyone of you, i will have to do a thank you post and shame you all with gratitude pretty soon. Stay blessed!

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Always

You. Me. Lost. Searching.
Life. Hard. Vile. Confusing.
People. Beautiful. Blessing. Regardless.
God. Forgiving. Merciful. Kind.
 
Cancer. 25. Why. WHY?!
Nothing. Everything. Faithless. Ignorant.
Health. Precious. Given. Grateful.
Family. Me. Her. Them. Us.
God. Faithful. Always. Always.
 
God. Faithful. Always. ALWAYS!

Friday, October 19, 2012

The way to The Way

Pain so deep it confuses you
Makes you forget your name
Who you are, where you are, Whose you are

Pain so real you can see it
Smell it, touch it

Pain so fresh it's almost attractive
Almost beautiful, almost seductive
Almost...

Pain! Deep!! Real!!! FRESH!!!
Everything and nothing

How can everything you feel consume all that you are and leave you with nothing?
How can you understand that there is a better way to think but keep feeling?
How can I, by the Grace of God, feed your soul when mine is starving, stagnant and repulsive?
If I can't practice what I preach then I have no business blogging.

I'm leaving  for a while...
Till I can put pen to paper and smile as I write, not cry
Till I feel again that the words I write are not mine but God inspired
Till He leads me back to The Way and off the way to The Way
Till then...
John 14:6 Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me"
***
 
 
Alot is happening and between my health, school, work and family i need a minute to see the leaves on trees. I'll  be back someday, reading your blogs, leaving annoying, long comments and posting hilarious nonsense that somehow ends up meaning something. If you need someone to pray with or just talk to send me an email or holla on twitter or skype and i'll be there for you, by His grace of course :)
 
Stay blessed!

Monday, September 3, 2012

Getting People

Justice - when you get what you deserve
Mercy - when you don't get what you deserve
Grace - when you get what you don't deserve (positively)

Fran - 60 yrs old. My former housemate (yes, i lived with a 60yr old for 6 months, now close your mouth and read), the one who gave me meds for free and called someone to stay with me at the hospital in Cysts, Stones and Gypsies , the one who prayed for me everyday and reminded me to ask myself how anything i'm thinking of doing will bring God glory, the one who revived my love of wanting to be a beacon of light for Jesus everyday, the one who got married on saturday!



Gbemi - everybody's big aunty on twitter, the one who has opened her home in Houston to me without ever asking my story(i was there again this weekend, remember THIS post?) , the one whose family is now my family, the one who shines so bright and loves so hard it makes your cheeks hurt from smiling in wonderment, the one who nearly killed me with craw fish!
Look how cute they are, my blackness is a prayer point:(

Craw fish with potatoes and corn on the cob
I promise it's the pepper and
not our love for food that
has us looking so serious.
 
Chiki - My precious, cousin, sister and best friend. The one who has heard all my miserable tales and kept them, the one who will never throw a pity party for me, the one who listens and never judges, the one who cracks up hard at my horribly dry jokes, the one who loves like she's never been hurt, the one whom i dedicate Emeli Sande's My Kind of Love video to (cos i'll get in trouble in a heartbeat for her lol), the one whose birthday was on the 29th of August.

 

 
People are awesome! God uses people to bless us and remind us that He'll always be here for us. People are the ones who physically hold us when we're done praying and need shoulders to cry on. When you've gotten understanding, please get people because they are the ones you will call at 2am when life gives you a flying kick. God graces us with people and i say grace because after all the times we've failed Him and people, we really don't deserve to have people.
 
May the Grace of God always be with you and may the size of your sin never limit your understanding of it but open your heart to appreciating it. I love you guys very much, Happy Labour Day and have a blessed week
 
P.S
Houston was awesome as usual, i didn't eat suya due to a series of unfortunate events but was able to stuck up on my naija supplies and the craw fish experience will keep me going for a while:D Fran's wedding was in Cypress (40mins out of Houston) so i used to opportunity to go get loved on by Gbemi. I also met Nugwa (@nugwatweets) and KitKat, see all that gragra she forms on her blog ehn, remember "wotchugondoabourrit"? Notin! She is super sweet and i had good laughs spending the day with them.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Wood and strings

Lent you Outsiders and my new Badu
While you were thinking I didn't have a clue
Tough to sort files with your voice in my head
So then I bribed you downstairs with a Malboro Red
And now I feel so small discovering you knew
How much more torture would you have put me through?
You probably saw me laughing at all your jokes
Or how I didn't mind when you stole all my smokes

***

Her name is Cherry, we've just met
But already she knows me better than you
She understands me, after 18 years
And you still don't see me like you ought to do

Maybe we could talk 'bout things
If you was made of wood and strings
While I love her every sound
I don't know how to tune you down

And you're so thick and my patience thin
So I got me a new best friend
With a pickup that puts you to shame
And Cherry is her name

And when I'm lonely, Cherry's there
And she plays along while I sing out my blues
I could be crying and you don't care
You won't call me back, you're stubborn as a mule

Maybe we could 'bout things
If you was made of wood and strings
You might think I 've gone too far
I'm talking 'bout my new guitar

Bwahahahahaha!!! Get your stinky little minds out the gutter :p This is just one of my favourite songs by Amy Winehouse. The first part is from the song You Sent me flying while the second part is titled Cherry and it's a skit after the first one on her Frank album.
I loved Amy Winehouse! I never agreed with the way she lived but i loved her music and it is sad that for me she is one of those rare talents that will never be replaced in the music industry. She died a year ago today on July the 23rd, 2011.

Life is hard, life is really, really hard and the truth is that we have all made bad choices and will still make bad choices even when we know better. I also know that tough love works but tough love is not cruel and sometimes, all it takes is a smile and a kind gesture to change someone's perception of the world. Be kind to people, even when there's no reason to be, especially when it hurts!

In the words of Kimya Dawson, if you wanna burn yourself, remember that I love you; send me an IM, I'll be your friend.

God bless you.

Here's a listen to both songs, Cherry starts at 5:18 after You Sent Me Flying. It starts a little slow and melodramatic but warms up beautifully and i love how she keeps you guessing about what exactly she's on about... Enjoy!

The link for mobile readers http://youtu.be/TwV5xUxBDxE


Friday, July 13, 2012

Young Adult (Running Scared)

Some people become adults when they become married (however old they are then), some do when they move out of their parent's home while others become adults when they get into college or start working. I, Dooshima Mabonga at 25 years of age became an adult when i used MY money to buy a TV last week.



Now, buying a TV is not a big deal in itself per se. It's just that when you're an irresponsible brat who would rather spend money on food, lingerie, unnecessary road trips and friends than on where you live (hello everyone who saw my apartment in Abj) then buying any sort of furniture becomes a HUGE deal.

School starts in about a month and i'll be moving into an apartment 2 days before that (not student housing o *side eye*) all the while working full time and i'm scared out of mind. Talking of being scared, did i mention i killed a snake all by myself last Friday?






















As I was saying, I'm scared of failing because i graduated (undergrad) in 2008 and i know my brain is rusty.

I'm scared of not finding the right roommate (roommate, housemate, flatmate same difference jor) to rent the other bedroom and
I'm even more scared that said roommate will up and leave without notice and i'll be stuck with bills i can't pay without feeding on my nails and hair.

I'm scared of not getting a job in my field till i'm done with Grad School but then again,
I'm scared that leaving my job will be me kissing goodbye to ever being a School Counsellor ( I need at least 2years of Teaching experience with a Masters to qualify for this, I have just 6months and i'm exausted).

I'm scared that i'm no longer scared of marriage and relationships.

I'm scared that there's so much trouble in Nigeria and all fingers are ending up on praying Nigerians who have been accused of praying and doing nothing else while the accusers accuse and do nothing else.

I'm scared that one day i'll have a nasty argument with someone on twitter over the last fear but above all,

I am scared of losing my faith.

I have hope though that this all is going to work out and God is going to make grace and favour be with me and my people so i'm happy and still a little tired but not so scared.

The best part though is having faith, because faith is stronger than anything hope could ever hope to be. So i'm holding onto my faith (and that of praying Nigerians) and smiling because i know that no matter what, no matter how, it will all be ok and this experience like every other will not be a weist. ;)

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts and always be ready to give a defence to everyone who asks you a reason for the faith that is in you, with meekness and fear; having a good conscience, that when they defame you as evil doers, those who revilde your good conduct in Christ may be ashamed 1Peter 3:15-16

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Corn Dog Elbows

*There's a beautiful story by Sola Macaulay (Maid of Heart) at the bottom so if you don't care to know what's been up with me scroll down and enjoy :(

Update
My little (half) sister wrote some silly poem about her little brother where his skin tastes like chicken, jaws like pie, has sugar drop candies for eyes, corn dog elbows and yummy french fries for toes. It's ridiculously awesome and makes me appreciate my family.

I'm fine by the way, thank you so much, so, so, much for all the emails, text messages and tweets. It's all behind now and i'm grateful to God for His mercies on His stubborn little baby who hardly does anything right. God is pretty cool and i love Him.

On my not so short stint away,  I drove 8hrs (16to and fro) to Mississippi, 6hrs (12 really) to Louisiana and went roller coaster riding at 6 flags, fun!!! I also got a speeding ticket and hospital bill that knocked the breath out of me, lol but such is life.

Rememer Maid of Heart? Yeah, one of  'The Few Good Ones' that just upped and left Blogger without a warning? Yup, the one with Faith Dames , that one! She's also known as *drum roll* Sola Macaulay (yaaaaaaay!!! Anonymous spell broken) and she put up a post a while back that had the hairs on my body standing from excitement at her imaginations, the creativity of the Almighty Creator and the inspiration from the story. Read and stay blessed :*


Fish Tale by Sola Macaulay

“Father, Mother, I had a dream that I’m going to be used by God.”

Papa and Mama Fish stared at their 800th son, their mouths hanging open. They wondered if they heard him right. Mama Fish was the first to recover as she swam towards her son.

“Are you sure about this, dear?” She said, touching her fin to his, the look of concern written all over her face.

“Yes, Mama. I have a special duty to perform.”

Daddy fish guffawed. “Listen to me, son fish. We’re fishes. We don’t get used by God. We get eaten by bigger fishes or people if we get caught or we spawn till we’re aged.”

“But dear,” Mama Fish responded, “don’t you think…”

“Nonsense, mama fish. Son fish is dreaming.”

Leaving his parents to argue, son fish swam out of the home cave and bumped into his brother at the entrance.

“I heard everything. So you think you’re special.” He smirked.

“I don’t know if I’m special,” he flutters his fins like a shrug, “I just know that I’m going to be used by God.”

“Huh!” Said his brother and blew bubbles at him.

Son fish swam out of the cave and felt an unusual current of water sucking him away. He glided on around his home and suddenly he saw a bright light in the distance. It was brighter than any light he’d seen, even brighter than when the sun pierced through the continental shelf. He became curious and began to swim. He swam up to the outer fringes of their territorial waters, following still after the bright light. Tired, exhausted but determined, he pushed on until the bright light moved closer to him and settled on the spot where he stopped. Just then another rush of current swirled up fine sand around him. When the dust settled, he saw a shiny button on the sea bed. He dove down and picked it up with his mouth. It was a treasure of inestimable value.

Suddenly, he felt a rush of bubbles in the water. He knew the familiar sound very well and he knew he had gone far, too far for Papa Fish to rescue him. A big white fish swam steadily in his direction. He clamped his mouth tightly and swam as fast as he could, the big fish hot on the chase. The swish swash of strong current spun him around till he came face to face with fate. Clenching his jaws tight against the shiny button, he waited. The big fish lunged at him and in that moment when he expected to end in the belly of this formidable enemy, the strong current pushed him up out of the grasp of the big fish.

A few seconds later he heard another familiar clunk in the water and this time he knew what he had to do. With the gold button firmly in his mouth, he opened wide just enough to accommodate the hook that pierced his jaw. The hook tugged and pulled him through the water up into the hands of a kind looking, bearded fisherman in flowing white tunic. He wriggled and thrashed himself against the wooden boat as the fisherman removed the hook from his mouth and peered closely to retrieve the gold button.

The fisherman smiled, wiped the gold coin and flung son fish into a basket. Son fish thrashed one more time, feeling exhilarated. Even as he took his last breathe, there was a knowing deep down that he had just been used for the Master.

"And when they were come to Capernaum, they that received tribute money came to Peter, and said, Doth not your master pay tribute?

He saith, Yes. And when he was come into the house, Jesus prevented him, saying, What thinkest thou, Simon? of whom do the kings of the earth take custom or tribute? of their own children, or of strangers?

Peter saith unto him, Of strangers. Jesus saith unto him, Then are the children free.

Notwithstanding, lest we should offend them, go thou to the sea, and cast an hook, and take up the fish that first cometh up; and when thou hast opened his mouth, thou shalt find a piece of money: that take, and give unto them for me and thee." Matthew 17:24-27
*

YOU are special
YOU were created for a purpose and
YOU are loved. You've always been and you always will be. Happy 4th of July!


We made puppets with  lunch bags and flags with thumb prints :D